Subject: Bog Off – Chapter17 Bog off! Authors note: All the usual caveats and dire warnings apply so you read this at your peril. Naturally, no representation of any person, animal, vegetable or mineral is intended, yet should you recognise yourself at some point in the story in conjunction with any of the aforementioned just think yourself very, very lucky to be included! As ever all comments, ideas, suggestions, good bad or indifferent always welcome and my apologies in advance for any typo’s you may spot. Tom email: [email protected] Health Warning: I feel obliged to point out that under no circumstances can this story be described as subtle, it is written very much tongue in cheek and relies on humour, if not decidedly black humour for it to deliver – so beware, some situations and characters will undoubtedly appear quite gross! Ergo, should you desire something of a far more erudite and sophisticated nature, I can but recommend my highly acclaimed “Brief Encounters” and “The Lab Technician” series. ___________________________________________________________________ Chapter 17 � Paper mammaries With the dinner bell having sounded Kelvin and Bogbrush barged their way through the younger pupils to the front of the queue, commandeered a table and set about devouring the equivalent of their own weight in chips and beans. With numerous furtive glances around to confirm they were conducting a secretive conversation Bogbrush excitedly regaling his latest penile adventure of less than an hour before. As Kelvin agreed, that coming on top of his previous afternoon’s experience with Byron certainly put him in the advanced beginner to intermediate class for sexual misdemeanours. The gist of the conversation was that against all the odds Mr Wilson had somehow managed to resist temptation and not touch Bogbrush, instead he had attempted to instil some order into the situation. That was all well and good as far as it went, until an unfortunate, if momentary lapse of concentration occurred whilst he was beguiled by the sight of Bogbrush’s drooling cock and inadvertently confessed to an attraction to boys. It was something immediately seized upon by Bogbrush, who wanting to exploit the situation then wrongly concluded that Mr Wilson actually wanted him to ejaculate, so quite naturally the action of anointing himself with Savlon increased dramatically in the hope it would lead to other things. The first thing being the start of a steady oozing of precum, which combined with the Savlon produced a delightfully slick aid to aid masturbation along with some delightful slurpy sound effects. The second, was simply that Mr Wilson now faced with such an arousing spectacle found he could resist no longer, he snapped and without any warning suddenly pushed Bogbrush’s hand away so he could hold the gooey head in the palm of his hand. The reaction was almost instantaneous, not to say predictable for with the strange hand fondling his cock Bogbrush began to pump a vast quantity of spunk over his trousers, blazer and Mr Wilson’s hand. Horrified at what he had done, Mr Wilson stood back with all semblance of authority now lost, yet Bogbrush in his simplistic way just grinned inanely having thought it was what had been required of him. “So, so that’s wot happened, I thinks he enjoyed it `cause I’s did! And then us…” “Hey Bogs, shut up a minute,” Kelvin interrupted and looked up, “shit, we’s got trouble, wot’s he bleeding want now?” “Wot? Who? Oh fuck it,” Bogbrush looked up to see Jason was obviously looking for them, “I’s got hard telling yer all that and was gonna say us oughta have a quick `un under the table!” “Oh fuck and I’s up as well now,” grunted Kelvin, he looked as Jason dragged a chair noisily over the floor to the table, “yeah, well wot d’yer fucking want then?” “We’s had an idea, Farty says his sister’s gert keen so why don’t yer see her after school, just to see wot yer thinks of her like?” “Oh, fuck, wot?” Kelvin didn’t wish to sound overly keen, especially since he was very aroused having missed out on masturbating under the table, yet he thought it a very good idea to see just what she did look like. “Has her got gert tits?” “Uumm, dunno, don’t knows nothing about girls does I?” Jason played dumb knowing she wasn’t at all blessed in the breast department, in fact quite deficient, but certainly made up for it by having a rather large stomach like her brother Farty. “Who’s this girl then? Oh yeah, yeah I knows wot he’s on about.” Bogbrush smiled, he would keep well out of any girl arrangements now he had a foot on queer ladder! “Well, I want’s a gert look don’t I?” Kelvin blushed. “Well I means..” “I knows just wot yer means!” Bogbrush laughed. Kelvin smiled back, he was already getting over excited and had previously slipped a hand down the front of his disgustingly slimy briefs beneath the table after hearing of Bogbrush’s adventures. Now spurred to new to sexual heights with thoughts of a beautiful young girl sporting humungous breasts, his cock lurched wondering whether it would be called upon to discharge for the third time in relatively quick succession. “So will yer do it?” asked Jason anxiously. “Before she changes he mind.” “Yeah, in ten minutes round the back of they bike sheds,” he shuffled on the seat unsure if something was leaking or it was just the usual gooey mess stuck in his pubic hair. “Tell her she can take one mate with her, I’ll takes Bogs with I, so yer gotta come back and tells us it’s on. Got it? Now fuck off then!” Not that far away the other factors of the equation we slowly coming together. “Oh shit, wot’s he bleeding want now?” Cilla looked at Gloria who in turn looked at Bella and then all three looked vacantly all around. “Who?” “Him, Farty.” Cilla nodded towards her brother scurrying across the playground towards them. Having been despatched from the dining hall after gobbling down an enormous plate of chips and beans he was partly propelled by flatulence and under instruction to arrange the immediate viewing between Cilla and Kelvin. “Ah, tell him to piss off.” Gloria returned to the task in hand, adding another thick layer of mascara to ensure she really did look like a boy eating tarantula from a horror film. “Maybe’s I outta get some of they false eyelash things, wot’s think?” “Yeah, shall us get some on Saturday?” agreed Bella. “Get ’em in Woollies I `spect.” “So wot’s yer bleeding want?” Cilla scowled as only she could. Both Bella and Gloria started to snigger as they looked Farty up and down, quite understandably he began to feel very nervous, especially when Gloria started to very pointedly look where the bulge of his cock should be. “It’s um, uumm about… yer knows.. wanna come over here?” “Nah, yer can talk in front me mates `cause they’s won’t bleeding eat you!” “Oh.. yer sure?” it wasn’t being eaten that worried him, it was them seeing his cock! “Course I’s bleeding sure, they’s me mates!” “Well alright,” he replied a little surprised since he was about to broach a rather delicate subject. Taking her at her word Farty didn’t niğde escort hold back nor bother to stand on ceremony, instead he launched straight in, “I’s told to tell yer that he says if yer’ll wank and let him touch yer fanny bits then yer can do the same with his gert willy!” Bella looked at Gloria and giggled, whilst they knew of the proposition it was fair to say that Cilla looked very, very embarrassed. “Shit! Why didn’t yer tell us yer was gonna say that!” “I just fucking did didn’t us yer daft cow! And, he says he wanna see yer first, to see if yer got big tits!” continued Farty unabashed. “In about ten minutes behind they bike sheds, he says he knows wot he got but he don’t knows wot yer got!” “He can fuck off! I ain’t being paraded around, like some fucking dog show,” she snapped, “tell him I’s might do it after school, but I’s needs to think about it.” “Yeah, but Cilla he’s `sposed to have a bleeding gert cock ain’t he?” Gloria, sensing the afternoon was going to turn moist was more than interested herself. “Think I’d take his offer to see wot he’s like if I’s was yer.” “Well I’s also been told to tell yer to sod off if yer’s ain’t wanna do it now and the whole bleeding thing’ll be off!” concluded Farty faithfully delivering the message to the expletive. “So wot’s yer doing, `cause I’s needs to know to tell him?” “Fuck!” exclaimed Cilla, in not the best of moods. “Wot’s think?” “How big’s his cock then… and he’ll wank for yer’s… Cill yer can’t not can yer?” replied Gloria enthusiastically foreseeing the afternoon turning from moist to wet. “Fuck!” reiterated Cilla, she turned to Farty. “Well how big is it?” “Fucking gert thing I’s told. it’s over nine inches and he makes loads of stuff!” it was quite erotic saying it, his own offering stirred deep within the rolls of fat. “Right, us’ll be there, ten minutes behind they sheds, now sodding piss off!” “I’ll tell ’em then.” Farty was already distancing himself from girls and hoping the strange popping sounds emanating from his trousers weren’t noticed, the equivalent of mustard gas sank to the ground in a deadly trail to await it’s first victim. “Wot’s that fucking smell?” snarled Bella looking around, Farty looked the other way! Back in the dining room Bogbrush and Kelvin were still sat at the table and had been passing the time by fantasising over the younger boys who came and as to whether they were compulsive masturbators or not. Kelvin had become so aroused that he really was having difficulty in holding back and oblivious that the product of his last emission had now soaked right through the front of his trousers as well. “She say’s she’ll be there!” gasped Jason having run in from the playground. “Ooh fuck!” Kelvin grinned. “Come on then Bogs, let’s see wot her looks like.” “Can I come?” asked Jason very hopefully. “Nah, fuck off… unless yer wants to go and flash yer little willy!” Kelvin laughed whereas Bogbrush having handled it, thought Jason’s little willy was rather cute! “Fuck yer and all!” Jason prepared to stomp off. “Well will yer tell us wot happens then?” “Only if yer sucks I off later! Now sod off!” Kelvin stood up, the front of the trousers wet with semen and with a bulge that would do justice to a donkey, not that many donkey’s wore trousers that was. “Fucking hell!” muttered a disappointed Jason under his breath as he walked away. “Give it five minutes and us’ll go round then, yeah?” Kelvin grinned, his cock twitched in it’s slimy lair. “Cor, wonder wot she’s like? Reckon she got gert tits?” “Dunno, but yer got a gert cock!” “Reckon five minutes is up?” he asked after fifty-four seconds. “Nearly.” Totally over excited, his trousers bursting at the seams Kelvin just couldn’t wait any longer so it was barely two minutes later when he and Bogbrush set off in the direction of the bike sheds. An area generally avoided by teachers, yet welcomed by miscreants it was knee deep in cigarette ends and the detritus of adolescent, desperate boys who really didn’t want to be seen doing what only desperate, adolescent boys would do. A fine selection of yellowing handkerchiefs, dirty tissues, empty cigarette and crisp packets dotted the horizon to complete the idyllic scene. As if to prove that very point, on hearing their approach two startled first year boys appeared from behind a wall, one holding up his trousers and the other clutching his fly as they ran out of sight. “Dirty little wankers!” shouted Kelvin after them. “Hhmm… I’d have liked to have seen ’em doing something!” said Bogbrush kicking the remains of a particularly choice handkerchief around with his shoe only to discover the remains of a condom underneath. “Ooh look at that, there’s some real dirty sods at this school!” “Yer fucking disgusting, wanking it’s all yer thinks of innit? Look at yer looking at they spunky old hankies and that old Johnny! Bet yer hard!” “So’s yer!” Bogbrush laughed. “We’s well matched ain’t us?” “Yeah alright.” Kelvin looked around, suddenly he grabbed the front of his trousers, “I hopes she bloody well gets yer soon otherwise I’s gonna have a gert accident!” “Well do yer blazer up `cause all that cums soaked though yer trousers and it makes yer willy look like it’s gonna burst out!” “Bugger,” he looked down, “reckon she’ll notice?” “Not if she’s fucking blind, no!” he looked down the overgrown path, “Anyhow we’s about to bleeding find out, `cause I’s can hear footsteps.” “Oh fuck!” footsteps there were indeed, trembling with a mixture of trepidation and excitement Kelvin looked at Bogbrush. “Now don’t yer dare fucking leave I’s alone with her will yer?” “Nah and don’t yer fucking leave me neither, not with no fucking girl!” Cilla was indeed on her way with Gloria who had won the privilege to accompany by a toss of a coin with Bella, to say they were also excited was an understatement. Cilla was positively steaming under her ultra short school skirt, her school knickers wet not damp, whereas Gloria’s appeared to be under a heavy dew. And, by some opportune, rather miraculous miracle, Cilla’s mammaries has suddenly blossomed making her, as she thought even more attractive. However, the truth was her vest was stuffed with almost a complete toilet roll. Sadly, for both Cilla and Farty their mother had absolutely no concept of fashion to the point where had become an embarrassment for them to get changed in front of their peers, especially for Farty wearing matching Guptha’s International white briefs and vest. Whereas for the flat chested Cilla the humiliation of having to wear a vest and not being allowed a major prosthetic confection to give the semblance of breasts as had Bella and Gloria was quite numbing. So a vest stuffed with toilet paper it was to be, although unfortunately not the soft tissue variety, more the regulation unyielding thick school issue and of the Izal Medicated variety! The girls stopped short of turning the corner, Gloria trying not to giggle as she again manipulated the more than ample, moveable paper breasts back into position. “Cill’s, I’s gonna have nişantaşı escort a fag, it’ll cover up the smell of that bleeding bog paper!” “Give us a bleeding puff then!” Pulling out a flattened packet of No 6 cigarettes from her bag, Gloria lit one, offered it to Cilla who took a couple of deep drags and gave it back only to find herself being pushed forward into view. “Oh fuck!” said Kelvin to Bogbrush as the two girls did their best to appear coyly in a cloud of cigarette smoke from behind the graffiti covered brick wall, carefully they picked their way over the rubbish strewn ground. “Well her’s got some fucking gert tits!” observed Bogbrush with a grin. “Glad I ain’t going near her!” “Ain’t very pretty is her? Bit bleeding fat if yer asks I!” Somewhat disappointed Kelvin was caught between a rock, a hard place and his rock hard cock. The saving grace was that Cilla appeared to have enormous and possibly independently sprung, breasts. He looked again wondering if he’d seen them move or was it just a trick of the light? “Look at his fucking blazer, he’s got a fucking gert cock under that!” hissed Gloria in between puffing on her economy cigarette and thinking that if Cilla did back out, should she maybe take her place? “Cilla, yer can’t miss out on he wanking for yer!” “Wot’s yer name?” demanded Cilla treading on particularly disgusting handkerchief as she approached. “Yer wot?” mumbled Kelvin, totally bedazzled by the enormous breasts. “Wot’s yer name?” Waiting for a response she very bravely moved a few steps closer, her extraordinary paper tits rustled as she moved. Beneath her skirt the wet, white, very unfashionable full size knickers had been hiked up to part her much rubbed, slippery, lippy bits. If only she could rub them right there! “Rather yer than I,” whispered a grinning Bogbrush, “I’s sticking to boys and just wanking!!” “Wot’s yer’s?” asked Kelvin, it was hardly the conversation to endear one to another. “Yer gotta do it, he’s got such a gert bleeding big `un!” reiterated Gloria in a not so hushed a whisper having studied the activity of the hand in the trouser pocket that no blazer could disguise. “Cilla. Who’s yer then?” “Kelv,” he sniffed and looked her up and down, if he were honest he had half a mind to quit while he was ahead, “wot’s that stinky bleeding scent yer got on then?” “Special innit!” Cilla blushed, the Izal Medicated was somewhat pungent. “Smells like bog paper!” “Yer fucking rude ain’t yer, wot sorta chat up lines that!” snapped Gloria having one eye on Kelvin’s magnificent glistening bulge. “I told yer, it’s fucking special!” reiterated a very embarrassed Cilla. “Well anyway’s, I likes yer gert tits, but yer a bit bleeding lumpy round yer bum!” it was the best Kelvin could manage as a chat-up line. “Yer a right cheeky fucker!” Cilla had been silenced. “Oi, wot’s yer fucking name again?” Gloria had managed to get herself into such a state of arousal that things were happening down below without manual help, she exhaled smoke over everybody. “Undo yer blazer I wants to see wot yer got!” “Nah, it’s too much for her,” replied Kelvin to Cilla pointedly ignoring Gloria. Maybe he didn’t want to quit after all, whatever he certainly wouldn’t get marks for tact, “well unless her shows us her knickers, I’s told she wanks a lot! D’yer do it as well?” “Bleeding fuck off!” it took a lot to make Gloria blush, but her Guptha’s International girly panties were heavy with juices, it seemed Kelvin had scored a direct hit. “Yeah, fuck off yer a rude cunt!” snapped Cilla decidedly red in the face and still really stung by the insult over her portly figure. “I’s ain’t gonna do it Gloria and I’s ain’t fucking fat! I’s ain’t being fucking talked to like that by him!” Bogbrush looked shocked, was this what girls brought out in boys? He was amazed at Kelvin’s forthright performance for he didn’t think he had it in him, although by now most of it was lubricating his sagging Guptha’s International lime green briefs. “Yer is gonna do it `cause yer knows yer fucking wants to hold it! So if yer wants to see wot I’s got under me blazer,” Kelvin wisely ignored the insults as he studied the brace of tarantula’s that adorned Gloria’s face, “then yer’s gotta show us yer knickers as well… I’s got enough cock for both of yer tarts!” “Fuck! Yer’s really telling ’em now Kelv!” added Bogbrush encouragingly despite having difficulty not laughing and still wondering if this was how boys and girls got on then how did they ever get married! “Look, I’s gonna turn the other way `cause I don’t wanna see her bits, tell us when it’s all over!” “Yer a rude fucking wanker!” observed Cilla pointedly, if accurately having become so worked up and aroused, she really wanted to see what was under Kelvin’s blazer. “Ain’t us all wankers then?” Kelvin laughed. “Well so?” “Wot’s gonna do then? Yer gotta bleeding see it!” Gloria whispered in Cilla’s ear. “I’s sure it’s a real big `un, I’s do it if yer won’t!” “Alright… us’ll bleeding do it.” agreed Cilla, although not that emphatically. “Right, well if I undoes me blazer, she can look first, but I wants a proper gert look at her knickers… then it’s yer turn. Right?” “Yeah, alright. Well let’s bleeding get on with it then.” Gloria’s voice was strangely husky, her knickers were soaking. Bogbrush turned quickly away, instead deciding to play with himself as he waited. Kelvin stood in front of Cilla, gave her a disparaging look and prepared to unbutton his blazer. If only he could unzip his fly and masturbate, for he knew his cock was on the verge of another vast seminal explosion, even if it was to be the fourth that day. “Bleeding hell!” gasped Cilla in genuine shock, she moved forward as he unveiled his trousers, her paper tits rustled, the left one had started to sag somewhat. It was indeed quite a sight. And, not just from the strain the trousers were obviously under from Kelvin’s quite magnificent organ, but after the mornings three powerful ejaculations the material was wet with swathes of sperm that had soaked through. “He’s fucking spunked already!” crowed Cilla thinking at last she had the upper hand. Kelvin, on absolutely prime form looked slowly down. Worried, but trying not to show it he guessed what he would see, although the situation was far worse than even he had expected. “Yer a stupid cow ain’t yer, don’t yer knows nothing about boys,” he sneered, “it’s just a bit of bleeding precum innit, I always makes such a gert load it leaks a bit!” Bogbrush continued to lick his fingers and smiled to himself, the contents of his foreskin seemed exceptionally tasty that day, to have licked Kelvin’s as well would have been ideal and the sticky icing on the cake along with a big red cherry. “Right now pull yer bleeding skirt up and let’s wot yer got then!” said Kelvin very forcefully, not having noticed that Gloria had turned sideways and one arm had disappeared from view somewhere under her skirt. “Wot!” Cilla’s voice sounded a little strange, for a moment her ankara olgun escort eyes glazed and her legs suddenly clamped together and she gave a wobble. “Just fucking do it or I’ll fucking pull it up for yer, just fucking hurry up!” exclaimed Kelvin, totally over excited, over aroused and unable to stop the flow of precum. As instructed Cilla nervously pulled her especially short school skirt up at the front hoping the fact she was tingling inside would not be noticed, Kelvin crouched down in front. “Ooohh fuck!” He groaned, he moaned, he shuddered. Immediately guessing what the bending movement had just triggered, Bogbrush who was still consuming morsels from his foreskin managed not to laugh. Luckily the girls were equally having difficulty in controlling their own orgasms did not realise what had happened. “Why’s… why’s..” Kelvin’s voice sounded strange from below, “why’s yer got yer grannies knickers on and why’s they all wet, has yer pissed yerself or something?” While lesser mortals or even lesser adolescents might have struggled to manage to and ejaculate four times in the morning, for Kelvin it was nothing and the quantity of sperm released was as ever easily triple the average boy’s discharge. This occasion was no exception, for though still crouched he could feel the hot goo still sliding down through his pubic hair and on between his legs. “Fuck yer!” Cilla peered down between her legs, it wasn’t the most ladylike pose and had she been honest Kelvin’s description was pretty accurate. “I ain’t wet meself… it’s, it’s… `cause I’s excited!” “Wot yer means yer’s cum then?” ignoring his own sticky predicament he took a closer look. “How?” Faced with the big question Cilla looked wildly at Gloria hoping for some help, it was not the right moment to start a demonstration! “Well yer fucking rubs it don’t yer?” said Gloria, who had just been doing that very same thing, “don’t yer knows nothing about girls?” “Course I fucking does!” Kelvin stared at what appeared to be a pair of semi-hairy lips through the acreage of wet, translucent material, the last magazine pictures hadn’t unfortunately been as detailed as they could have been. “Well stand up and show us yer cock then!” commanded Gloria. Cautiously glancing down as he stood up, it felt as though most of the latest influx had been contained in his pubic hair and there wasn’t that much filtering through the front of trousers. “Me big brother don’t make no fucking gert mess like that, I reckon yer’s cum in yer pants and that ain’t precum!” said Gloria somewhat breathlessly, for like Cilla she was also currently experiencing a series of violent orgasmic twinges deep between her legs. “Oh, fuck off! Yer don’t know wot yer fucking talking about,” said Kelvin very firmly, “how many times yer seen him wank then?” “Oh..” Gloria twitched, wobbled, oozed, desperate to push a hand between her legs. “Well? How many?” also desperate to masturbate yet again he waited for an answer. “Once..” her voice had changed again, luckily her panties were very, very absorbent, not though absorbent enough for things felt slippery between her legs. “Oh! That all!” Cilla was quite disappointed for even she was under the impression that Gloria was quite an expert on the subject on her brother’s sex life. “So yer’s don’t fucking really know then do yer? So’s pull yer skirt up then!” Much to Gloria’s embarrassment Kelvin burst out laughing for she was wearing the infamous Guptha’s International girly panties made from the wrong material with the football pattern and a handy gusset for young ladies accoutrements. “Ha ha… look at they knickers! Yer likes balls don’t yer!” “Fucking bog off!” she snapped, the put-down over her brother had not helped. “Has yer wet yerself as well then or has it rained on yer pitch!” he laughed, not the thing to do. “Bleeding looks like it!” “Yer can fuck right off now,” she pulled her even shorter school skirt back down, “yer’s fucking seen enough!” “So’s when we doing it then?” Kelvin was now determined to carry on, he attempted to button his blazer over the shimmering expanse of tenting trousers. “We’s still doing it?” Cilla gulped, she had hoped they weren’t and looked at Gloria who nodded in confirmation. Gravity moved Cilla’s left tit down closer to her waist “Yeah, we is and yer mate here’s gonna do it with yer, like I says I got enough cock for the two of yer!” said Kelvin. “Yeah, fucking right we is, were’s and when then?” Under cover of the very animated conversation Bogbrush has just ejaculated. Yet his thoughts were not on girls, but on the morning’s activities and had subsequently drifted off into fantasy land only to be woken by Kelvin poking him. “Come on Bogs, they’s gone now, it’s safe for us to go.” “Oh.. wot.. oh!” he opened his eyes and blinked in the daylight. “Fuck wot! Right, yer happy then that yer done it with `em?” “Oh yeah, I’s done it… and we’s gonna meet an do it proper,” he said excitedly, “she had them gert tits, then she showed us her knickers, but when I’s looking at ’em I couldn’t bloody stop cumming could us, still I’s don’t thinks they noticed!” They both started to walk towards the wall, albeit rather awkwardly since both their underpants were positively wet with semen. Still euphoric at his partial conquest Kelvin looked down as they reached the graffiti wall, for only now was the messy reality of his situation sinking in. “Oh fuck!” he gasped, it was undoubted his worst ever case of seminal infusion. “Wot? Oh fuck!” Bogbrush was surveying the trousers. “Wot.. wot yer fucking done!” “Wot? Oh shit!” the situation had finally registered. “Oh fuck Bogs, wot a sodding mess… wot’s I gonna do now?” “Just hold yer water, now let’s have a butchers then,” said Bogbrush rather calmly, he immediately saw the extent of the disaster area once the blazer was unbuttoned, “cor, Kelv yer’s bleeding done it this time, it’s the worst yet. Yer can’t go into no class like this yer covered in cum and yer smells and all!” “Our mum’ll bleeding kill us when I gets home!” “Wot, not again!” he grinned. “Look, yer can come back to our house, us can try and clean yer up a bit before yer goes home, but first we gotta do something here.” The adrenalin of the sexual high now past, Kelvin verging on despair and looked desperately around only to see the disgusting selection of decaying tissues and spunk impregnated handkerchiefs lying on the ground. “Shit Bogs, there must be something here us can use to wipe it up a bit!” “Shut up, I’s just gonna have a look see wot’s about.” said Bogbrush disappearing round the corner of the brick wall. There was nothing else Kelvin could think to do except make a start by running his fingers over the trousers and then licking off the excess. “Anything there?” “Yeah, yer a fucking lucky boy!” called out Bogbrush, who appeared grinning from behind the wall and clutching a bundle of white paper, “looks like some silly sods undone a roll of bog paper up the path, that weren’t there when us came was it?” “Dunno. Nah, don’t think so?” said Kelvin, not recognising Cilla’s enormous moveable mammaries in their compacted form. “It ain’t used is it?” “Course it bleeding ain’t! But it’s that stinky school stuff mind.” “Sod that, let’s get on with it before somebody comes.” “Pity it ain’t that nice soft stuff or I’s take a bit home!” Chapter 18 to follow