Or, “what would Annie Sprinkle do?”
***
Everybody here is a grown up; meaning an adult at least eighteen years of age or older. That includes the reader, the author and the fictional characters depicted in the story. Even if some of us don’t act as if we are.
***
What would Annie Sprinkle do? I thought I knew the answer to that question. I just needed to make sure that I ‘first did no harm.’ Doctor Sarah Bartolino could not tell me what I needed to know; but she could tell Kelsey, and she thought nothing of explaining it to him while I changed his IV and listened.
Kelsey had no idea why his doctor was answering an unasked question, but he didn’t stop her. People don’t argue with doctors. He had no idea at the time what a good decision that was.
I guess that small subterfuge could have turned out to be a little bit cruel if Lydia had not agreed with my idea. But the benefit of being with someone that you have known since you were both five is an amazing ability to predict how they will react to any given circumstance. Lydia would agree to, and almost certainly participate in my hare-brained scheme.
***
Growing up in the seventies and eighties my brother, like all the other boys probably, had a collection of magazines reserved for his private viewing. At least he thought that they were for his private viewing. I found them one day when mom and I were spring cleaning. I did not tell mom about my find; instead from that day on I would sequentially borrow one of his many magazines for my viewing pleasure.
I only ever took one at a time; figuring he wouldn’t notice having just one fewer; especially when it would mysteriously reappear in a day or three. I don’t really think he would have minded; but I would have been mortified if he had found out. That’s why I couldn’t just buy my own; it would have been way too embarrassing.
I shared them with Lydia, Darcy and Diane, we were a pretty weird foursome,’The Gang of Four.’ Hey, it was the seventies. Diane, who sometimes only answered to ‘Diana of Themyscira,’ was the weirdest but it was by photo-finish. The four of us would read the magazines together and study their contents. ‘The Steiner Bureau’ was scarry, and yet totally intriguing at the same time.
My favorite however, were the diary like stories by Annie Sprinkle. She was everything that I was not, urbane, experienced, popular, over the top beautiful, openly erotic and sexual. I didn’t even officially lose my virginity until the night of my honeymoon at Elephant Butte.
I married the boy who had sorta halfway chased me through our last two years of high school; and I must have been a horrible disappointment to him. He just stopped coming home thirty-seven days after we returned from that honeymoon.
Lydia moved in with me; that way she got away from home, and I didn’t have to move. At first we were just roommates. Darcy moved away to go to college in Albuquerque, without even saying goodbye to us. Diane was busy running her parent’s farm; over time we did less and less together. It happens. Lydia was not having much success on the romance front either. We spent a lot of evenings together just talking.
Philadelphia Texas, our hometown, had self-destructed years ago. The economy was in the toilet. Diane’s parents went down to Odessa to work in the oilfields. Nobody would buy land for what it should have been worth, so her and her brothers bought a few distressed properties. When my lease was up she gave us a deal, and Lydia and I moved into a little house on one of those farms.
Diane acquired a girlfriend, Meiko. She didn’t flaunt it, but she didn’t hide it either. She had to go all the way to Lubbock in order to find someone even weirder than she was. Maybe that is what we would have to do, expand our search parameters.
There was this convergence of themes. Lydia and I moving out of town. Moving out of a little apartment where everyone knew what you were doing. We were watching Diane and Meiko together and happy. Having, both of us, exhausted the male romantic leads available in Philadelphia; we simultaneously expanded our search to include the adana escort other gender and narrowed it to include only those we trusted.
Lydia and I slowly, tenuously became lovers in addition to being best friends; that was ten years ago. Darcy came back and offered us a route to earn nursing degrees. It beat working at the Piggly Wiggly and the Roxy, so we followed her out to Nuevo Mejico; Las Vegas and University Hospital where that conversation with Doctor Bartolino just occured.
***
As we washed the dishes and put them away after dinner that night, I asked Lydia. “Remember at Doc Samuel’s funeral you said what a shame it was everyone was up there thanking him when he wasn’t there to hear it?”
“Yeah.”
“How folks should be nicer to each other when they are here on earth,” I said. “How one ‘thank-you’ in person would have meant more than all of the accolades given to him on that day.”
“Yup, that’s what I said.”
“Remember when we… You, me, Darc and Di used to sit at the rusty old ice cream table behind your garage and read Duane’s ‘girly-books?'”
“Sure Mave,” she said. “‘Don’t wrinkle them, or get them wet,'” she mocked.
“I have an idea to bounce off of you,” I said.
“Shoot.”
“Doc Bartolino said it was safe.”
“What is safe?” she asked.
“One of my patients is dying. He’s got lotsa stuff all interacting negatively with each other. He’s lucid, he’s aware that he hasn’t got long and he’s all alone.”
“What did you have in mind Mave?” Lydia asked.
“In one of Duane’s magazines,” I said, “Annie Sprinkle wrote a story about going to a hospital and fucking a guy who was terminal. A kinda celebration of his life with just the two of them.”
“Uh-huh.”
“So my guy can’t fuck anyone, the medication for his condition has knocked his equipment all out of commission,” I said. But I noticed that he had a little paperback in his bag, a ‘girl-girl’ story.”
“And you thought”…
“He might like a live show,” I said.
“How on earth would you ask him?”
“I just would.”
“No, Mave,” Lydia said, “that’s not you.”
“You know what cheap-ass bags the hospital has for a patient’s belongings. I found that paperback when I replaced his bag, it had a tear.” I said. “I did it when he was in the shower, before but I could do it again in front of him. Make note of the book… Ask him if he ever… Would he like to”…
“OK, that’s Mave,” she said.
“Are you cool, if he wants to touch?” I said, “we need to set up the boundaries now, together before involving him, otherwise it’s just cruel.”
“You know I trust you,” she said. “I will do anything you do first, or say you’ll do next.”
“I love you,” I said before kissing her deeply.
“Did you really think that I would say no?”
“No,” I said, “I wouldn’t of asked if I thought you’d say no.”
“Huh”…
“But isn’t it nice to be asked.”
“I guess it is Mave,” Lydia said. “How do you think you can pull this thing off though.”
“I have ‘Nights’ tomorrow, you could just come over and we could lock the door and give him a sponge-bath… Together… He is ambulatory,” I said, “he takes showers, but he just might accept a sponge-bath instead if all three of us were naked”…
“And you have to take off his monitors for the shower,” she said.
“And I can run out of tape to reattach them.”
“You little shit!” She said in mock anger.
“What?” I said.
“You are going to be on the clock while we put on this little show,” she said, “I won’t be.”
“You will receive your reward in Heaven, my child.” I said, kissing her again. “While I will be cursed for making myself a prostitute.”
She stared at me.
“Of course Jesus loves prostitutes,” I said smiling, “he hangs out with them.”
Lydia put her left arm around my head nesting my neck in the crook of her elbow. Then she placed her right hand on my hip, and did an excellent impression of the sailor in Alfred Eisenstaedt’s famous VJ-day photograph taken in Times Square.
God I love her.
“Alone,” she said, “and dying?”
“Yeah,” adanaescort.biz I said, “Jenny said his wife left him because she couldn’t take seeing him die in front of her.”
“Burrrr,” said Lydia.
“Yeah,” I said, “I wasn’t dying, but I know what that kind of rejection feels like.”
“I’ll never leave you,” Lydia said.
“I know.”
“I’ll just over-insure your ass,” she said playfully, “and push you out an open window.”
***
I called Lydia from the nurses station after Kelsey had accepted our offer.
It was harder asking him than I thought it would be. The first part was easy enough. Baby steps… I just walked over to the rolling table with a new bag and started removing things from his old bag. He barely acknowledged my presence. I put everything in the new bag except his book.
“Is this any good,” I said, “the book?”
“Oh, you wouldn’t be interested in that.” He said, finally noticing what I was doing.
“No good, huh?”
“No, it’s just guy stuff,” he said.
“The picture on the cover is two girls… Oh… Are they?”
“Yeah, like I said, guy stuff,” he said.
“My girlfriend might like it though,” I said. I almost chickened out and didn’t say it, I’m glad I did; that word got his attention.
“Girlfriend”…
“Yeah, she’s coming by later,” I said. ” Would you like to meet her?”
“I’m not very good company.”
“I was married once,” I said, “for forty-four whole days.”
“Wow, what happened.”
“I must have been real disappointing,” I said, “he just left a few weeks after the honeymoon.”
“That was cold,” he said.
“Yeah, that’s what Lydia said.”
“Lydia?”
“My girlfriend,” I said, “want to meet her?”
“I guess so, but why?”
“I have this stupid idea,” I said.
“What,” he said. Was he getting more interested or was I just imagining that he was.
“Kelsey,” I said, “have you ever been with two girls at the same time before?”
“No,” he said, “and I won’t ever be; my shit don’t work.”
“You could be,” I said, “in about two hours when the attendings go off duty.”
“I can’t get it up anymore,” he said, “the meds did that.”
“You have eyes, fingertips, and a brain,” I said.
“Sure, but why.”
“Because I know what being rejected feels like,” I said. “It eats at you. Would you like to have Lydia come here and help me”…
“Fuck yes,” he said. “Sorry”…
“We could change your sheets,” I said, “and give you a sponge bath and then we could do something together on your bed. Something that will make us have to change the sheets again.”
“Could I take a shower?” He said, “I like feeling clean.”
“Sure,” I said, ” we could all get undressed and you could take a shower.”
“Oh fuck,” he said, “that would be so nice.”
***
The Attending Physicians went home, and I started disconnecting Kelsey’s monitors. Then I removed their sensors. Each was held to his flesh by a little sticky tape. I could usually get the tapes off without leaving residue if I took my time. I was slow, careful and almost done when Lydia arrived.
“I think it will be less awkward if we all disrobe,” I said as I locked the door to the room.
“Here babe,” Lydia said kissing me and handing me a plastic bag. It had a pair of flip-flops in it.
The kiss got Kelsey’s attention.
I helped him sit up, and then walk to the bathroom. I don’t think he really needed help, but it was policy to prevent falls. My moving his hand from my shoulder to my breast was not policy, but Kelsey seemed OK with it. The bathroom was small, I had to shut the door for both of us to fit inside and access the shower.
I took his silly little gown off and threw it in the hamper and took my blouse and bra off and hung them on a hanger on the back of the door. Kelsey was all eyes now. I took my skirt and my panties off, then I replaced my shoes with the flip-flops. I stepped in front of him to turn the water on and adjust its temperature, brushing my back and buttocks against his chest and crotch in the process.
He put his left hand on my left hip. After I had the water just right I slowly turned to face him allowing that hand to drag across my back to my opposite hip. I started to pour some body wash on my hands and make a lather.
“Put your other hand on me,” I said. “I don’t want you to fall.”
He put his right hand on my left breast, gently touching the small ring in the nipple.
“Did that hurt?” he asked.
“Just a little, a long time ago.”
“It’s really cute.” He said, as I spread the suds on his chest.
“I have four here too,” I said, moving his hand to my crotch so that he could feel them.
“Wow,” he said.
“It feels nice when they are gently played with,” I said, as I lathered his back.
He toyed with my cunt rings as I lathered his hair. Then I broke contact to kneel and get his legs.
“Put your hands on my shoulders,” I said.
Once he was holding me and I had lathered his crotch and legs I took his flaccid penis into my mouth. I wanted to cry; it had been a very long time since I had done this. I knew I wasn’t very good at it; but it should have been getting hard as I ran my tongue and lips across it. It’s like the center of a boy’s universe; losing its functionality must be just awful.
I toweled him off, and then myself; then both of us, naked this time, made the return walk to the bed. He had his right palm on my right buttock the entire way; so he wouldn’t fall. Lydia had pulled the blinds, changed the sheets and was lying, naked in all of her glory, on top of the bed. God, she was gorgeous. I reminded myself that Doc Bartolino said Kelsey’s heart could take it.
Lydia spread herself out, and I sorta helped him climb up on top of my lover. Then I climbed on top of him. Lydia guided his head to her right breast, and he kissed the little ring in its nipple as she played with his hair. I reached over his shoulder and kissed her and played with her left breast. She released his head with one hand and put that hand on my head holding us both.
Kelsey kissed a diagonal line of kisses from Lydia’s right breast to her left hip, and I joined in the adoration of her flesh, kissing her side and belly and finally her mound. Kelsey watched intently as I lapped at my love’s pussy. Bathing it in my saliva while drinking its wondrous fragrant juices. Unfolding its tender sensitive pedals.
I took each of Lydia’s labia rings into my mouth, and very gently pulled on each one sending electrical impulses directly to the pleasure center of her brain. I bade her pearl to expand, and to come out and play. Then I bathed it in my saliva as well. Lydia squirmed seductively as I caused her crura to fill with blood and eight thousand neuro-chemical explosions to occur.
Then having watched all of this from a distance of several inches I bade Kelsey to do as I had. He looked Lydia in the eyes, she smiled, and he dove in. He nibbled her labia and used his tongue to play with her rings. He imitated a hummingbird trying to place his bill and its long tongue inside of her vagina. I stroked her as he lapped, placing my left thumb on her meatus and massaging the bottom and top of her glans with my index and middle fingers. This time there were twenty-three thousand explosions.
I drank in the additional sweet savory ‘jus de Lydia’ she had just squirted. Kelsey seemed to like it too. After a minute or three Lydia sat up and said, “your turn.”
So I laid down, my butt in a nice little wet spot, and spread myself out. I was already nice and wet; Lydia sank two fingers in me right off the bat. She was pulling on my cunt rings with her lips and furiously two fingering me. She gently guided Kelsey’s head to my quim, and he lapped at my folds and my bud beneath its hood; as she went from two fingers to three, and my twenty-three thousand fireworks were launched.
She slowly pushed in four digits for a few thrusts, and then went to her entire hand. Pushing it into me as Kelsey was licking my swollen clit’s head. She had me right on the brink and…
She stopped.
She guided his hand into me, it was a little larger than her’s, but I was boiling. I was ready. I helped by scrunching down on his hand as he was pushing it into me, and oh it was wonderful.
He thrust his entire hand into me, and Lydia licked and nibbled and I exploded again.
***
Lisa Ann