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I don’t know why but being bored and horny is always a recipe for disaster
Logging into a random chat for my area
I scroll thru the countless dick pics and bad pick-up lines
I go back n forth between the chat and Pinterest, I’m suffering from an extreme case of bored-ness.
Bemydarkpassenger: Jason or Michael
Me: Michael all day. You?
Bemydarkpassenger: Not sure, never seen the movies
Me: Why would you ask then?
Bemydarkpassenger: To see if you were a bot. Are you male?
Me: Last time I checked I wasn’t
Bemydarkpassenger: When was that?
Me: About 15 min ago in the shower
Bemydarkpassenger: Human, Female, and hygienic I hit the jackpot tonight. What are you looking for this fine evening?
Me: I hate that question
Bemydarkpassenger: But it needs to be asked
Me: Does it?
Bemydarkpassenger: Serial killer looking for a willing victim?
Me: No, but you might be, as you are the one with your Dexter reference
Bemydarkpassenger: You watch Dexter?
Me: No, but a friend used to and I’d sit thru a whole recap even though I didn’t watch it so I know a little
Bemydarkpassenger: Interesting. So back to the question. You are looking for…?
Me: Honestly
Bemydarkpassenger: It’s the best policy
Me: eye roll emoji. Ideally would like to find a candidate for a friend with benefits thing
Bemydarkpassenger: So, a fuck buddy?
Me: Sort of
Bemydarkpassenger: Just out of a breakup or something?
Me: Nope
Bemydarkpassenger: Why that and not a boyfriend?
Me: I want the comfortability of friends but with unlimited sex without the burden of a relationship
Bemydarkpassenger: What does one have to do to apply?
Me: Lol
Bemydarkpassenger: Well I want to apply, so give me your number so we can build this ‘beneficial friendship “
Me: You don’t even know what I look like.
Bemydarkpassenger: Friendship is deeper than the skin so let’s start there and see if it’s worth sorting the rest out.
Bemydarkpassenger: Better yet, here is mine, and just send me a message and I’ll add yours that way.
Me: Think I’m going to give you a fake number
Bemydarkpassenger: No, but now that you mention it my way is to avoid that.
I guess I don’t have anything to lose I think to myself.
Me: Should your name be saved as dark passenger?
Bemydarkpassenger: Yes lol. Or you can put boring ole James
Me: Ok. You can save mine under Lola.
Bemydarkpassenger: Nice to meet you Lola
Me: Nice to meet you too James
Bemydarkpassenger: It’s getting late. Is it ok if I message you tomorrow?
Me: Yes
Bemydarkpassenger: Good. Tonight, was successful if you ask me
Me: We’ll see
Bemydarkpassenger: Oh, I love a skeptic
Me: Good night Sir
Bemydarkpassenger: Good night m’lady
The next day I am in the middle of trying to finish up a file. Tossing around the idea of what time would be best to take my lunch when my phone vibrates.
James: Hey it’s dark passenger
Me: Hey, how’s it going?
James: It’s going. On lunch though I’d check-in for our friendship building.
Me: Lol ok. I was just contemplating when to take lunch
James: Why not now. So, we friends can chat
Me: Ok
James: Tell me when you’re free
As I logged out I seemingly put last night out of my mind not really thinking anything would come of it.
Me: Officially away from my desk
James: Good. What’s for lunch?
Me: Probably a salad. You?
James: Pizza. Don’t tell me you’re a salad girl?
Me: No, just don’t want to fuss over lunch and it’s quick. Usually, skip lunch most days. Plus, nothing wrong with being Çankaya Rus Escort a “Salad girl”, pizza man.
We launched into the normal get to know you chat such as age likes, dislikes, favorite color etc. We continue messaging back and forth throughout the day, which extends to nonstop messaging daily for weeks on end.
***************************
As I am lying in bed after work a few weeks later, we continue to message back and forth.
Me: I think we need to set end times. I’m too tired to work lately
James: Whatever time you pick
Me: You’re not too mashed up work?
James: I am but it’s worth it
Me: Ugh fine. More coffee it is
James: That was a true friendship milestone lol. M’lady, it’s time for us to exchange photos.
We’ve been chatting for a least a month If not a little over a month. I know this part was coming but was hoping to delay it as much as possible.
He should know I’m no knockout if I’m on the Internet looking for a fuck buddy.
Ughhh
I’ve never been the most secure or confident gal. I think I am decent or average at best. I got a few hoots and hollers but so did fish ugh
I could just block him and pretend it never happened
But I kind of like him and he was the best candidate I’ve encountered ughhhhhhhh
Fine. If he’s no longer interested after then I tried. Knowing him he’ll say so nicely and I’ll move on with my shattered being
I wish I knew how to seriously edit a photo but that would backfire eventually it’s better, to be honest upfront
James: Let’s send it at the same If that makes you more comfortable
Me: No. I’m going first just calm your tits
Looking for the best photo I hit send then silenced the phone. To avoid the impending let down I decide to go take a shower.
After getting out I check to see read receipt but no reply. Oh well, another one bites the dust.
Me: It’s the personality that counts right. I
Me: Ignore that.
Me: It was nice talking to you.
I heard the phone chirp grabbing it to open thinking it was a message only to see that it is a call shit I already answered I stare at the phone in shocked silence too frozen in shock to hang up
I hear a distinctly male voice
Are you there Lola?
Yes, James? Or dark passenger should I say laughing awkwardly
Lola. You’re gorgeous never talk about yourself like that again. Got it!?
Yes, sir mockingly forgetting you can see my sarcastic salute
Now that we got that out the way. This is nice. Talking on the phone I mean
I just sent you my photos in case you decide to run for the hills.
Ok, I haven’t gotten it yet I’ll check for it later
There is a long awkward pause before we both start laughing like crazy people. After we pull it together we launch into our normal random chatter with bouts of normal conversation.
We both start to yawn more than talk
You started the yawning I state while yawning
I’m pretty sure you started it plus you are the tired one always falling asleep on me anyway
That may be true but you started it tonight
It actually morning
Siting up looking at the clock I see it’s 230 am and we have been on the phone for 3 hours straight….
I’m already in bed so at least I will just turn over
Don’t brag I’m on the bed but not in it yet. hold on. Putting the phone down I strip and jump under the covers – why is it always so cold in the wee hours or maybe it’s because we are tired
Still up?
Yes, as you’re the tired one passing on your contagious yawns. All comfy now?
Yes, so comfy. Definitely will probably pass out on you randomly. I feel up now but I know that’s because it’s cold
Aww, you need some warmth. What are you wearing?
I feel my face warm and my stomach Keçiören Rus Escort flip as it seems like your voice dropped an octave but I could be imagining It
Lola, you asleep on me
I am still stunned into silence not sure how to answer or if I want to take it there
Good night beautiful talk to you tomorrow, more like later. Sleep well.
G’Night sir
She’s back! Sleep well
You too.
Before my brain has a chance to start overthinking things, I pass out from exhaustion
***************************
Oddly enough. I woke up at 7 am feeling full rested especially given how late we were up.
I go to message you good morning to prove I’m not the tired one when I see your photo open
Quickly locking the phone I get up to go complete my morning routine
What are you 12 sheesh I think to myself
I sit with the teacup and open my phone
To see a new message
James: Morning sleepy head
Damn he beat me ugh
Enlarging the photo, I stare at it, why is he so fucking hot. How does he find me attractive – maybe he’s lying or trying being nice? Omg. How is he single… I don’t think I asked him that wonder if it’s too late or awkward to ask now.
Me: I was up first
James: Ha no proof I messaged you first
Me: Maybe my phone died
James: It did not I remember you saying you were putting it on the charger
Me: Fine but I was up first you just messaged first. I awkwardly blurt out Sooooooo. How are you single?
James: The same way you are, I guess
Me: Nope, not the same, plus that’s such as a cop-out answer
James: Fine. You go first
Me: I’m not normal first off and I never found someone worth not being single for. You?
James: Same. I have had my fair of dates and interactions with the opposite sex and found nothing yet that was long term
Me: I’m going to have to be your wing woman. It’s obviously not your looks you must have a poor talk game
James: I talk to you just fine.
Me: Yeah, but I’m not your normal female nor am I girlfriend material. If we met in a bar I doubt we’d end up partnering up anyway
James: What makes you say that?
Me: I doubt I am your type
James: You don’t know my type
Me: Touché but I still have my doubts
James: You can have your doubts but I’ve never seen you or anyone similar out at the spots I’ve been too
Me: Maybe you have a bad talk game and taste in pick up locations
James: Seriously?
Me: Yes. Ever picked up a chick at a supermarket
James: No, that’s where I go to get groceries
Me: See… you can meet a cute lady in normal clothes that cooks take care of herself etc…..
James: I’ll give you that one can’t say I’ve thought of that one before
Me: You should look next time you go to the store
James: Trying to pawn me off, you must have really hated that photo
Me: No, just saying.
James: Well back to us and less on my bad pickup lines and taste in hangout spots. What are your plans for today?
Me: A lot of nothing – going to relax just do whatever comes to mind. You?
James: winging by my parents and some errands
Me: Sounds thrilling
James: We are a bunch of party animals lol. My mom’s calling, so I better head out. I’ll call you tonight
Me: Ok, don’t party too hard
James: Is that “ok” confirming I’m calling you tonight too?
Me: Yes
James: Good. Talk later
Me: Wave emoji
Laying back I realize I am staring at the ceiling with a stupid smile on my face. That giddiness that comes with new things – new humans are always so exciting shaking myself out of it before I start to overthink things I hop in the shower to get the day officially started
Later on, that night we catch up on our day and spend Etimesgut Rus Escort a little too long gripping about parental guilt and the burden of being the childless unmarried child.
We fall into this odd routine of day text and night chats it’s not “consistent” as a set schedule but consistent enough to be called a routine.
James: Is there any other candidate?
I stare at my phone in confusion for a moment.
Me: Candidate?
James: Yes, for the beneficial friendship
Me: What?! Why would you ask that?
I call and you answer on the 1st ring
What kind of questions is that? I have no idea why I’m offended and somehow annoyed by this question
Hi to you too. It’s an honest question, I just wanted to know if I had any sturdy competition I should be upping my game for.
Are you joking?
No, it’s a fair question
No, you’re the only applicant. Should I pull the application for the shredder?
If you think so
Pausing I take a deep breath to go out of my feelings. What’s up with you? You had a rough day?
Yeah
Go on
You dump your stressful day where nothing went right, just a classic bad day.
Sounds like you need ice cream or a shot of something that is at least 80 proof
Is that an offer or just a recommendation?
A suggestion…?!
Are you offering to take me for ice cream and a drink?
No…!? As usually my brain freezes trying to process what you say omg you want to meet but I look like trash.
Earth to Lola. No way you fell asleep it’s only 6 pm I hear you grumble to yourself. It’s ok I can go eat ice cream and drink alone without any friends……
I’m sure you have plenty of other friends
No, none are as wise or attractive as you
Omg, quit trying to flatter and guilt trip me at the same time
Is it working?
A little. Hard to say no to a friend in need. I do know a pretty good ice cream place but not so much any drinking hole. ooo I know a place with boozy milkshakes which is the best of both
Send me the boozy milkshake address and I’ll see you there in an hour no make that an hour and 30. You’re great Lola can’t wait to see you!
The phone goes silent and I realize you ended the call. Fuck what just happened
As I panic, I try to call you back but it goes straight to voicemail
Your message pops up ‘You wouldn’t stand a friend up’
Fucker did it on purpose… I can just block his info and not go ugghhhh
Hopping off the couch I run to the bathroom while setting a 45-min time. As I shower I try to think of what does one wears to meet up with a sex friend for milkshakes. Fuck. Casual I guess. I’m so bad at this. It’s not a date date but a friend meet-up. That thought oddly calms me a little. Plus, he already knows what you look like soooo nothing really lost better to be comfy
Opting for my dark wranglers, cropped long sleeve tee, and these platform booties that screen ex-stripper in the most tasteful way, in my opinion.
Checking the time, I have 15 min left. So, I, quickly put on some skin tint and eyeliner
Brushing thru my hair for the 10th time
Would it be weird to do a hat… no hat?
I hear my phone chirp I grab it thinking the timer is going off only to see puppy eye emoji rolling my eye I grab my keys and head out.
As I get in the car I realize I should have taken a shot or something to help but it’s too late now.
I am 15 min out I see a message stating you are there waiting for a table for us it’s a 10 min wait
I voice reply I am 15 out
Focusing on the music and chatter on the radio to avoid feeding into any nervousness… deep breaths.
We’ve chatted on the phone and texted tons. Exchanged photos and were have known each other for like 2 months and some change now. This is normal. Ugh if so, why do I want to vomit a little.
Taking a few more deep breaths I check my reflection and jump out
I text you – seated?
Yes, in the back-right corner from the entrance high top. Want me to come to grab you?
No, I can find you.
Putting my phone up as I approach the restaurant tries to take some calming breaths and get into a positive state of mind.
What’s the worst that can happen.